Earlham Echo

August 30, 2022

Playing golf with both my sons a couple weeks ago, we were getting ready to hit off the first tee at 5×80 for our back nine. A large group of people that were walking from the parking lot to the clubhouse stopped and watched us from over the hedge that separates the tee area from the path. It was several of the Cardinal teachers/coaches, so, obviously, there was a little extra pressure on us to perform.

Kyle had honors, like he had for most of the day—unfortunately for Quinn and me—so he went first. His drive was fine, though not as spectacular as I’m sure he wanted under the circumstances. Quinn went next and someone said from over the hedge, “No pressure, Quinn.” He rose to the occasion and hit one long and down the middle. Then it was my turn. I really didn’t want to hit my infamous slice into the adjacent corn field—a field so far to the right that, seemingly, no golf ball could ever be hit so poorly as to reach it. But I’ve done it. Nor did I want to overcorrect and yank one hard left into ‘death valley’—an area where the grass gets so long, it would be easier to find an errant ball in Mordor.

I was clearly thinking too much, and that’s bad in golf—or any aspect of life, really. So to relieve my growing anxiety, I walked to the back of the tee, waved my arms at the group, and shouted, ‘Let’s hear some noise!” That drew a couple laughs, which was great. I figured if I followed with a terrible drive, they might walk away afterward thinking, ‘Gosh, that guy is funny, isn’t he?’ instead of, “Man, he sucks at golf.”

I teed up the ball, went through my long, perfect-swing checklist in my mind as quickly as I could, and let it fly. The ball started left, then curved a bit to the right, landed near the middle of the fairway, and rolled out nicely. I leaned over, picked up my tee, and swaggered toward the cart—trying to act like I do that all the time. Someone said, “Hey, Todd, you hit the ball pretty far for an old, retired guy.” The comment was well-executed—part compliment and part sarcastic jab. I fling those around our house so much that I only get blank stares now, followed by my target saying, “I know what you’re doing.”

So I appreciated the remark on multiple levels, but I chose to focus on the more flattering portion of it regarding the nice drive, while still paying homage to the less important and not totally accurate barb.

I responded, “That’s what happens when you play every day.”

I don’t play every day, but I was on an every-other-day pace a few weeks ago. I had to do it. I was playing the best golf of my life. I hit the ball straight. I hit it long. I made greens in regulation. I made putts. Par was easy, bogies were fewer, and birdies came more frequently than ever before. I wasn’t sure why. I had made some adjustments to my swing, but I’m constantly making adjustments, so why the current tweaks were working is a mystery.

I have always wanted to be an ‘80 guy.’ My dad regularly shot 80 and below and I want to do that consistently, too. For those couple of weeks, I was there. I thought, “Is this who I am now? Am I really this golfer?”

I thought about it for a while and decided—probably not. The good golf times probably won’t last. The swing will regress, the back will tighten up, and my current level of confidence will wane.

This might be a better story if I had answered the question with, “Of course I’m that golfer. That’s the new standard. Expecting anything less now would be cheating myself. I’m going to practice and practice and keep getting better.”

While I still think I have some golf upside, I’m not going out of my way to work too hard at it. And golf is a lot of hard work. I still pick up tips from Golf Digest or watch School of Golf occasionally, but I’m not spending a lot of time out on the range.

Hard work, of course, is a good thing. I highly recommend it—and it’s all I’ve ever required of my kids or anyone who has ever worked for me. For any young athletes reading this—yes, work hard at your sports, work hard at school, and be the best you can possibly be.

Even as an ‘old, retired guy,’ I’m still working at getting better at some things—golf’s just not one of them.